“Oh, Christ.” Trae shivered under Jon, as if the honesty was too much. “What have I done? I should have never married her. Why did I do this?” Jon leaned up on his elbows so he and Trae could speak to each other. “Did you know I would be on the cruise?” “No!” Trae lowered his voice and said, “No. How could I?” “What happened, happened. I think fate is beyond my comprehension. And when I think about my own personal life? I feel as if I’ve been waiting for you.” Trae tilted his head curiously. “I haven’t gotten involved with anyone.” “Ever?” Jon hated to admit it. “No. I lost my heart at Northeast High. I guess your memory made letting go of my affection impossible.” Trae appeared stunned. “How can that be?” Jon shrugged, straddling his knees so Trae was between them. “Just is. I wish I knew the answer.” “What if we never met up? What if I wasn’t on that cruise?” “I may have eventually met someone I liked. But I always would feel as if I were settling for second best.” Trae’s eye began to tear up. “I’m just telling you how I feel. I’m not giving you a line of bullshit.” Jon watched the reaction Trae was having to his words. He couldn’t tell if what he was saying was tearing Trae apart or not. To try and alleviate the tension, and Trae’s stress, Jon made a comical gesture of looking around the bedroom, then said, “I don’t see any ship ninjas lurking.” Instantly the expression on Trae’s face changed to laughter. On the ship, when they had attempted a make-out session near the spa area, they had been spied by another passenger and made a quick escape. From that point on, mentioning ‘ship ninjas’ made them both laugh. As Trae appeared to calm down, he caressed Jon’s hair and jaw, gazing into his eyes. “No one said life is easy, Trae.” Jon pressed his crotch against Trae’s. “But some things in life are worth fighting for.” “Make no mistake.” Trae held Jon’s head in both hands. “I am in for one hell of a fight.” “Let me be there. Let me stand by your side.” The comment appeared to surprise Trae. “You mean come to Florida?” “If that’s where you need me, yes.” “But.” Trae’s countenance changed once more. “But?” Jon used the tip of his tongue along Trae’s chin. “But then everyone would know? But…then your sexuality would be exposed?” Trae’s expression went deadly serious. “Yes. And Nadine would kill me in court.” “And you don’t think she knows? The woman you only stayed married to for less than a year has no idea you prefer men?” “I never let on. How would she know?” Jon raised an eyebrow at Trae at his naivety. “How’s your sex life with Nadine, Trae?” Trae recoiled and released his affectionate hold on Jon’s face. “That’s none of your business.” “That bad?” “Jon.” Trae shook his head as if he were humiliated. “I had sex with my wife.” Jon nodded, biting his top lip as he thought about it. “I assume you had. You had sex with the girls in school too.” Trae met Jon’s gaze again. “So, do you consider yourself bi?” Jon asked, not trying to be mean, but growing concerned this was not going to end well for him and Trae. “I consider myself straight.” Jon stifled a laugh as he was about to gesture to their two cocks which were nestled together. “Wow. Where do I go with that comment?” “Do I need a label?” Trae asked, appearing confused and slightly helpless. “Not for me. No. But I think what you really mean is you have identified with the idea of being a straight man.” “That’s the same thing.” “I’m not so sure.” Jon wriggled on Trae’s hips. It was as if a light turned on in Trae’s head and he got it. “I’m a fraud.” “You’re not a fraud.” Jon kissed Trae’s chest, loving the hair on his sternum. His lover was all man. Not the Hollywood-shaven-self-absorbed-narcissists he was used to dealing with. He began kissing his way down to Trae’s treasure trail. “Oh, boy.” Trae stiffed up, in his body and his dick. “You’re why I’m in this trouble!” Jon stopped short and looked up at Trae. “Am I?” That upset him. Trae opened his mouth to reply but nothing came out, as if he was trying to decide. Jon was not happy. He propped himself up on his arms and asked, “So, if I hadn’t been on the cruise, your ‘sweet wife’ wouldn’t have locked you out of your home?” Jon used a term of endearment Trae had used on the ship, describing Nadine. Trae paused for thought. Then replied, “You had nothing to do with it.” “Thank you. I rest my case, counselor.” Jon kept kissing lower on Trae’s pelvis. When Trae spread his legs wide, Jon tried not to laugh. Having been the first lover Trae allowed to go near his ass, Trae told Jon he had lost his cherry…in Rostock, Germany. Which was ironically where they were at port when Jon gave Trae a nice rimming and prostate rub, both of which sent Trae literally howling in pleasure. Before Jon sucked on Trae’s cock, or enjoyed his anatomy in any way, Jon smirked at him. “You spreading your legs for a reason, counselor?” “Guilty as charged.”
